I long for the friendship of a mentor in my life.
Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
(Titus 2:3-5 ESV)
I’m confident that this is an area that God uses to help me be shaped into more of His likeness. I love sitting and listening to women older than me on areas that God has blessed them with in wisdom. Recently, I’ve been frequenting some sights that I believe to be Gold Mines in my journey as a single woman. I’ve come to realize that it doesn’t matter if I get married or not, I can’t continue to place my hope in that. However, this is not easy to live out as it is entirely against the grain. I’m continually preached to that I was made to be a helper and for that reason I must long to be married. But just because I like to keep my head in reality and not in the clouds doesn’t mean I don’t have that desire already in me.
I already long to be a helper but I’m not married, I have no prospects of marriage and I may never get any. Thos are the facts but, if that day does come, I would like to think that my husband would be blessed by me learning how to place my hope in Christ for completion, satisfaction and fullfillment because let’s face it, a husband is not going to complete me. And if I hear one more person preach at me that I need to stop with my ”I may never get married” because THEY think that it’s a shame that I don’t find completion in finding a husband,then I’m going to shoot my foot!!! haha j/k
To not find my completion as a woman in a husband doesn’t make me less of a woman. I wish these ladies would understand that. I’m not against romantic love, (and I certainly don’t think Piper is either especially after reading some of his poems to his wife) but I’m not going to fill my heart and mind with ideals that God never even sanctioned. I am going to strive to become the woman God made me to be and that is His image bearer. Yes, I am made by God as a helper fit for a man, but in order to be an adequate helper I need to set my priority on what is truly important, God. I think that the mindset of needing to be married in order to be complete is just what God was talking about when he said:
To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.”(Genesis 3:16 ESV)
No, this doesn’t mean that God sanctioned for us to find completion in a husband but actually He warned us that this would forever be our folly. Just as it is truth that childbearing is a pain, so is it truth that we inately have a desire for our husbands. Doesn’t the context of this passage preach something to the mindset that this is not the way God intended us to be a helper? Before Eve was formed God explained just how he was going to make her:
Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”(Genesis 2:18 ESV)
According to this verse, before the fall, we were made to be a perfect fit as a helper. Sin defiled that, so as a woman my aim should be to reconcile that. And the ONLY way to do that is through Jesus. Of course, one way that God uses us to bear His image is through the relationship of marriage. It is a beautiful thing to be married because that is a beautiful way to glorify God. But, it’s not the only way God created us to be. There is magnificent truth in Isaiah
Thus says the LORD: “Keep justice, and do righteousness, for soon my salvation will come, and my deliverance be revealed. Blessed is the man who does this, and the son of man who holds it fast, who keeps the Sabbath, not profaning it, and keeps his hand from doing any evil.” Let not the foreigner who has joined himself to the LORD say, “The LORD will surely separate me from his people”; and let not the eunuch say, “Behold, I am a dry tree.” For thus says the LORD: “To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and hold fast my covenant, I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off. “And the foreigners who join themselves to the LORD, to minister to him, to love the name of the LORD, and to be his servants, everyone who keeps the Sabbath and does not profane it, and holds fast my covenant– these I will bring to my holy mountain, and make them joyful in my house of prayer; their burnt offerings and their sacrifices will be accepted on my altar; for my house shall be called a house of prayer for all peoples.”(Isaiah 56:1-7 ESV emphasis added)
It’s so important that JESUS expounded on it in Matthew:
Jesus said in Matthew 19:12, “There are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.” We need not take this (“made themselves eunuchs”) to mean any kind of physical sterilization any more than we take Jesus’ words “tear out your right eye” to mean physically blinding ourselves. But it does mean that Jesus approves that some of his followers renounce marriage and sexual activity for the sake of serving Christ’s kingdom. “Let him who is able to receive this receive it.” – John Piper
Piper also references Paul:
That is what Paul chose for himself and what he encouraged others to consider in 1 Corinthians 7. “To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. . . . I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife . . . . I say this . . . to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord” (1 Corinthians 7:8, 32-33, 35). In other words, some are called to be “eunuchs” for the kingdom of God. Paul speaks about each having his own gift: “one of one kind, one of another” (1 Corinthians 7:7). In other words, “Let him who is able to receive this receive it.” – John Piper
Most don’t understand where Nuns are coming from but as a journeyman I’ve become a “baptist nun”, and from that I think I finally understand where they are coming from. It’s not crazy, I commend them for it! Someone else that I’m progressivly learning more of is Amy Carmichael. It wasn’t until today that I learned she also wrote about Japan!!! My heart is rejoicing in finding this book that I am sure I will come to treasure!
From Sunrise Land: Letters from Japan By: Amy Carmichael
Next, is another nugget that looks at the biblical role of manhood and womanhood. With such renowned members as Rev. John Piper, Dr. Theol., Daniel L. Akin, Ph.D., Joshua Harris, C. J. Mahaney and many more:
And finally, my personal favorite. This blog is written by older women who want to have Girl Talk! hehehe I love it! Mainly they are conversations on Biblical womanhood and as they put it…other fun stuff:
http://girltalk.blogs.com/girltalk/
I hope you enjoy those links…I’m thinking later I’ll share some other resources that have been a blessing to me as a single. Until next time, じゃ、 またね！
